Although we constantly fear relationships going out of control, the reality is that we have none. Our minds merely seek patterns.

If someone reminds you of a person from your past, you may create a relationship structure based on the old person that doesn’t fit the new one at all. Then you wonder why things are going badly when they went so well before.

In dynamics with a lot of power involved, we see people lying, betraying, threatening, even blackmailing others. This creates an environment of drama that exhausts everyone involved.

Although we can’t control other people, we must learn to maintain control of ourselves. To do that, we need autonomy.

Autonomy expands your awareness of the elements of the relationship and helps you communicate openly, express your personality authentically, and release any constraints that may hinder the new relationship.